Chris Hardie's Weblog

As we dive into May, the month that restores honor and dignity to the season of Spring after the treachery enacted by March and its bastard stepchild April, I thought I'd mention a few favorite "May" things:

MAYonnaise: a polarizing, controversial condiment to be sure, but how can you deny its sweet lubricating effect on an otherwise incomplete sandwich? Or its critical role in various dips, melts, and other appetizers? Mayonnaise, you have won our hearts with your mysterious origins and your ubiquitous presence in culinary tool sheds everywhere.

MAYberry: hometown of Andy Griffith and friends. This idyllic community gives us all a bright vision to strive for - you can walk everywhere you need to go, the sheriff doesn't cary a gun, people named "Gomer" can live out the American dream, and even the drunks lock themselves up of their own accord. With the simple addition of broadband Internet and an updated phone switch, Mayberry could be my favorite hometown.

Ensign Travis MAYweather: Travis, oh quiet man with steady hands, how deftly you pilot the Enterprise NX-01
through the unfriendly Expanse. We are impressed that you do not complain as your character development is constantly put off by the none-too-subtle morality plays that your captain encounters, struggles with, and then resolves in the course of 44 minutes every week. You are commended for your loyalty and resolve.